So the Yomiuri Giants are some 49,000 games above .500 less than a month into the season. The E-List figured the Giants would have to be much better than they were last season, when the Giabbit cried so many tears over Yomiuri's crummy season he looked like a strung-out teenager who wore eyeliner in the rain, but at this point, the Giants are getting a little silly.

Yomiuri is going to be a tough out for any team all season long, but the good news for Hanshin Tigers fans, who are reeling from last weekend's series loss to the rival Giants, is the pace must slow eventually.

With a 15-4-1 record thus far, the Giants would have to be magicians to keep it up for a whole season.

But when you buy half an infield from the Japan Series champions, that has a way of improving a team pretty quickly.

WE ALL KNEW Kazuhiro Kiyohara would get beaned again soon. The veteran slugger has been plunked 196 times in his 21-year career including last week when Fighters pitcher Yu Darvish nailed Kiyohara's pinkie in the first inning, ending Kiyohara's night.

News photo
Orix Buffaloes' Kazuhiro Kiyohara is hit by a pitch from Hokkaido Nippon Ham Fighters hurler Yu Darvish April 20 at Tokyo Dome.

Kiyohara's X-rays were negative, but the 188-cm, 104-kg meat rack was positive after the game -- positive that No. 197 will likely bring out some Julio Zuleta action.

Kiyohara stood in the box for a while before taking his base, making the List wonder whether he was going to charge the mound and make mincemeat of the slightly built Darvish, who could do nothing more than tip his hat as an apology. Well, that and hope Kiyohara wouldn't take the scenic route to first base.

Kiyohara's 3-year-old son was in attendance last week at Tokyo Dome, which likely motivated this statement to Japanese reporters after the game.

"Rather than thinking of criticism and punishment, I will think about protecting the important people," Kiyohara said. "No matter whether the pitch is intentional or not, I will protect the people I care about. "The next time it happens, I am going to rush the mound and slam the pitcher down."

The List would buy Jeremy Powell a cup of coffee to nail Kiyohara, just to see how the threats would hold up when charging the mound to defend his honor would mean locking horns with the 195-cm, 104-kg J.P. instead of the stringbean Darvish. Both Kiyohara and Powell, along with Fernando Seguignol, would be somewhere on the List's All-Japan Butt-Kicking Team, but the List thinks it would be a bit of an age reversal, with J.P. taking on the role of Nolan Ryan and Kiyohara playing the part of Robin Ventura.

Speaking of Powell, the List would like to begin the campaign to re-instate "J.P." on the back of his jersey, which he used last season with Orix. Now with the Giants, he has to be known as "Powell," but with the way he is throwing shutouts, perhaps he likes his jersey just the way it is. Baseball players are kind of superstitious.

News photo Lee Seung Yeop of the Yomiuri Giants rounds the bases on an 11th-inning "sayonara" homer against the Hanshin Tigers April 21 at Tokyo Dome.

SPEAKING OF THE GIANTS and their acquisition of former Marines Lee Seung Yeop and Makoto Kosaka, it has been a smooth transition for both players to the Central League.

Lee looked good against CL pitching last year in interleague play and in the Japan Series, and he has continued right on with his new team.

And it may finally be time for Lee to play where he always wanted, in the majors.

Lee didn't want to play in Japan from the very beginning. After slugging 56 homers in 2003 with Korea's Samsung Lions, he wanted to head straight to MLB, but after receiving offers that he felt were beneath his worth, Lee came to Japan.

His first season, he played like someone who didn't want to be where he was, but more in the pouty sense than the hungry sense. Last season, he rebounded, and on the strength of an impressive World Baseball Classic, Lee is playing this season like he wants it to be his last in Japan. The big dog's gotta eat, and he may have a major league deal to chew on if he keeps it up.

FUN FROM THE BOX SCORE: Kenji Johjima came on as a defensive substitution in the Mariners' 6-4 loss to the Detroit Tigers on Sunday, taking Yuniesky Betancourt's spot in the lineup. Betancourt had been pulled for a pinch-hitter, someone Yakult Swallows fans will have no trouble remembering. Who was it? None other than Roberto Petagine, the CL home run champ in 1999 and 2001.

Petagine has not done a whole lot since heading back to the majors (28 appearances in 2005 and this season combined), but at least he's more Japanese than Richie Sexson.

MEANWHILE IN THE PACIFIC LEAGUE, Rakuten is the only team that has yet to win 10 games. It looks like the PL is going to be putting the "Pa" in parity this season, save the basement-ridden Eagles.

Should be even more interesting to see where everyone stands after interleague play, which begins May 9. Lotte won the interleague title last season, and with the Marines still below .500 after last week, interleague season could be all that remains to boost the champs back in the PL's top three.

SHORT ONE THIS WEEK, folks. Be sure to say hello on the train. Send the List a line at [email protected] saying what color shirt you will be wearing.