When I came to Japan, after a dateless college life, I was very popular with the ladies in my town, regularly going on "group dates" of just me, and 3-4 young women.

But to my dismay, in my second year, another guy from the States came into the area. He was true-blue cool, right out of MTV: rock-star good looks, played guitar, rode motorcycles and was very popular with the girls in his university, who kept calling him and sending letters.

I thought my days as Charisma Man were coming to an end, figuring him to be the sure thing for the girls to want to be with.

But, amazingly, other than in the classroom, the guy couldn't get anyone to even look at him twice.

By this time, I had settled on one girl as my steady girlfriend, and so asked some of the other girls (who still hung out with me) why they didn't hang out with the new guy?

Their response, "Him? He's too weird;" "Yeah, he even has earring," said another, giggling.

"And, I think he's gay," said a third. When I asked why, they imitated how he would hold up his hand to whisper an aside to me. "That's what gay men do in Japan," my girlfriend whispered.

He became frustrated and left Japan without renewing his contract. I, of course, renewed with a big grin on my face. -- Steve in Shizuoka