Satoru Tanaka tentatively pulls from his briefcase a well-thumbed sheet of plain paper, onto which has been sketched three smiling faces along with a simple but astute message: "Daddy's promise," it begins. "Always smile, and if you feel the urge to fight, take a deep breath."

As he reads the message, written not by a life counselor but his 10-year-old daughter, Tanaka (not his real name) lets out a faint sigh as he recalls one of the times he abused his wife.

"I hit her three times and abused her incessantly, badgering her and manipulating the conversation in a one-sided way to get my point of view across," says Tanaka, 50, his hands clenched tightly together in his lap. "The next day when I saw her, she was clearly sick with fear."